Online Friendships

This afternoon, I’m going to be talking on the phone to an online friend for the first time, and I’m really looking forward to adding another dimension to our friendship.  This led me to reflect on how this world of e-mail, online forums, social media and other forms of online communication has changed how we meet people and find friends in ways we never could have imagined even twenty years ago.

I’ve enjoyed e-mail from its early days.  I’ve participated in online forums and message boards, and found it a fun way to meet like-minded people.  Some of these online meetings progressed to real live meetings and lasting friendships.  In fact, one of my closest friends is someone I met on one of the very early online services almost twenty years ago.  Anyone else remember Prodigy?  I think the only thing older than Prodigy was Compuserve at the time.  Mark Zuckerberg, Jack Dorsey, Biz Stone and Evan Williams were probably in kindergarten playing with Fisher Price plastic computers back then.  Nancy and I “met” on a message board discussing a movie we both liked, and from there, we took it to individual e-mails, and eventually we met in person (and that’s a really fun story for another day).  The fact that we live in different states did not get in the way of our friendship turning into one of these true soul mate relationships that happen only a handful of times in a lifetime.  We’ve been exchanging multiple e-mails each day for the last twenty years, occasionally talk on the phone, and we try to see each other at least once a year.   

With social media like Facebook and Twitter, meeting like-minded people has become easier than ever.  I came to Facebook and Twitter kicking and screaming  – despite my positive experiences with online forums and message boards, I didn’t see how one could form anything resembling a real relationship on these very public media.  Thankfully, I was proven wrong. 

Facebook and Twitter have allowed me to make contact with people I never could have met in real life.  Whether it’s the author I’ve admired for decades, or the veterinarian whose articles I’ve only read in journals before, or the many fellow cat people who share my love for these incredibly fascinating and wonderful creatures – I treasure all of these relationships.  They’re all special in their own, unique way.

The lines between online friendships and real life friendships are starting to blur.  Sometimes, it feels that my Facebook friends know more about my life than some of my real life friends that I only see occasionally, even though they’ve been in my life far longer than my online friends.  Nothing beats getting together with my real life friends, but the day to day status updates and comments from my Facebook and Twitter friends have become a part of my world that  is as important to me as my real life friends.

Has social media changed how you think about friendships?  What role do your online friends play in your life?