It is with a broken heart that I’m writing to let you know that my sweet Ruby girl passed away Wednesday afternoon. I needed some time to mourn her privately before being able to share the sad news with you and mourn her publicly.
Less than three months after she was diagnosed with what was most likely renal lymphoma, my precious little girl is gone. I chose to provide hospice care instead of pursuing aggressive diagnostics and treatment, and I have not regretted my choice for one moment. Even though that choice may have cut our time together short, it made up for it with love a thousandfold for what it lacked in length.
As Ruby’s energy and weight fell off over the last few weeks, she still loved her two favorite activities: being in my lap, and eating. When it became evident that the cancer was winning, I made the agonizing decision to let her go while she was “still Ruby.” I barely had time to get used to the idea of her being terminally ill before she died at home in my arms on Wednesday.
Ruby joined Allegra and me in April of 2011 as a six-month-old kitten. She brought so much joy and light to our home during the past eight and a half too short years. This little cat was all about loving and being loved. Allegra and I are trying to cope as best as we can as we will be adjusting to life without Ruby.
Eventually, I will write about Ruby’s hospice care experience in more detail, but it’s probably going to be a while. While writing has always been part of the healing process for me after losing a cat, it’s not something I am able to do while everything is so raw and hurts so much. I’m going to need time to heal from this profound loss before I do so.
I adopted Ruby from the SPCA of Northern Virginia. If you’d like to make a donation in her memory, that would be a lovely way to remember her.
Fly free, sweet girl. I will never stop missing you.
So sad for your loss.
We are heartbroken fur you. Ruby was such a gawjus girly amd we luvved seein’ her here. We’re sendin’ hugs and purrayers.
Luv ya’
Dezi and Raena
I am heartbroken to hear of Ruby’s passing. It seems so soon since her diagnosis. I know there is a big hole in your heart and in Allegra’s too. She and Allegra have felt like cats of mine too as I have felt so close to both of them and to you. I can’t tell you how heartbroken I am and send you much love and hugs.
Ingrid, I’m deeply sorry for your loss. My heart simply broke into when hearing the news I know exactly what you’re going through. It’s extremely painful to lose one of your fur babies. I’ve lost several, including one this past March that I still haven’t gotten over. I pray every night for my kitties, past and present, and all cats in the world that some day I’ll see them in heaven. I’ll include Ruby by name in my prayers from here out, and I’ll pray for you and Allegra as well. Stay strong in this difficult time. Take care and to God be the Glory.
Blessed be, sweet little Ruby.
My heart aches for you and Allegra. Sending you love & light to help heal the hurt and soften the hard edges of the empty space she leaves behind. Peace & blessings~
Ingrid, we are so deeply sorry to read this!
We do everything we can for our furmily, and even then, we can still get a stupid disease. So unfair. You continued your love to the very end & gave Ruby the greatest gift of setting her free.
One foot in front of the other right now. Take all the time; you need to process and heal. Keep your routines the same for Allegra, she will mourn Ruby too, and I’m not sure what’s worse! We have been through this, and the grief is no less for the cats. It is gut-wrenching for all.
Hold on tight to Allegra and know we are ALL thinking of you and understand the profound loss.
Fly free, Ruby – you will be remembered, sweet girl.
Big Hugs & scratches to Allegra, please!
Our deepest condolences! Holly, Mark, Purrkins & Saxton
Oh Ingrid, I’m heartbroken for you & Allegra. Your time with Ruby was way too short, but you did make the most of it. I think it was the kind & loving (but difficult) choice to spare Ruby the aggressive treatments and let her final days be ones of peace & love. Will keep you & the girls in my thoughts and prayers
I am so so sorry for your loss of Ruby. I to loss my beloved Blue and it will take time to heal the broken heart..God Bless
May Jesus bless and comfort you and Allegra both. May the three of you all be reunited someday in His eternal kingdom. i am dreading when this happens to me. i have two cats and the older Blackie looks like Ruby(except twice her size)and the younger Greyboy loves teasing Blackie . May God bless all animals and children
Ingrid, I am so very sorry to hear that your sweet Ruby is gone. I know letting them go is never an easy decision, and it doesn’t seem to matter if we know we only have months or weeks or days left with them. My love and prayers to you and Allegra.
Dear Ingrid,
My sincere condolences to you. It’s never easy to say goodbye to a beloved pet. I so enjoyed your stories of Ruby and Allegra. I am heartbroken for you. May you find comfort in your memories.
There are no words to express how sorry I am for your loss. Ruby was an integral part of your life and Allegra’s life. There is going to be a hole for a long time that may heal but will always be empty. Thank you for sharing Ruby with all of us and I’ll be thinking of you in the weeks and months ahead. Hugs and purrs from one cat house to another.
My heart skipped a beat when I read the subject line this morning….so sorry for the loss of Ruby. You and Allegra will miss her terribly but rest easier knowing she is free and pain free. So difficult to lose one of our fur babies. Kitty City sends its love and purrs your way.
So very, very sorry for your loss of Ruby! Wishing you peace in the days ahead with wonderful memories of Ruby that will always be a part of you.
All of us here at Skittles and Friends send you lots of purrs and prayers of peace and comfort during this difficult time. *Huge Paw Hugz*
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my Tortie, Mama Kitty, last year (kidney failure). Torties have a reputation for being difficult, but my experience was wonderful. She took care of her two tortie kittens even though she had Cerebral Hypoplasia. One passed away, but the other one was placed in a great home. She then took care of other foster kittens and cats. She was very loving, and could climb stairs and up to my bed with her claws. She died in her bed in her sleep, next to another one of my cats. I hope all kitties go to heaven, and wait for us. I’m sure Allegra will comfort you as my other cats did for me.
I can’t say enough comforting words. Losing our babies is one of the saddest events in our lives. I lost one if my girls two weeks ago and the sorrow is still raw. My absolute condolences to both you and Allegra. Through your writings ruby and Allegra became our babies too. It is also our loss.
I am so terribly sorry for your loss, Ingrid. Ruby will be in our hearts forever.
We are so very sorry. Sending you comforting purrs…
We weep with you.
I cried when I read this, Ingrid. I lost my beloved Nita to jawbone cancer in September. I, too, chose hospice. The diagnosis was definitive and the cancer, aggressive. We had 6 weeks left, but we made the most of it. And although I had to make the “final decision” and thought I was prepared, I couldn’t stop crying. We grieve in different ways, but I have a sense of what you’re going through. Peace.
Oh Ingrid, I’m so sorry. no words… sending you love and holding you tight in my heart.
My heart is broken. I too, am working, conservatively, with a 20 year old calico that has kidney disease. My prayers are with you.
Hello, my name is Kim and I have subscribing to your site since around 2013, when I adopted my cat. I like this site, it is very informative and helpful to all pet owners.
I am sorry for your loss.
Oh Ingrid, I’m so, so sorry to hear about dear Ruby. We know how difficult it is and we all send purrs, hugs and all our love to you. Ruby really was fortunate to have picked the best Cat Mom ever.
Oh, Ingrid, I’m so sorry to hear of Ruby’s passing. The love you have for your girls and they for you shines out in every word you write. My two “kids” and I are in the process of mourning my husband who died unexpectedly on Dec 5. I’ve been sort of stuck and I haven’t shed many tears, until now. Ruby’s story brought them out and I thank you for that. I’m convinced we’ll all meet again someday, over the Rainbow Bridge. (((hug)))
When I read your post of Ruby’s passing, uncontrollable tears flooded down my face. Through your Conscious Cat sharings over the years I’ve gotten to develop some feelings for Ruby. We love the animal creatures so much that when we decide to give some of them a home with us, we set aside the knowing of the pain we will have to endure as each one of them must be let go. We will continue to love them and help them thru life inspite of our own inevitable shattered emotions.
Ingrid & Allerga,
The loss of a loved one is unbearable. All cat Mom & Dad’s share your loss. Along with their fur kids. I guess….I could go on & on….
But time will heal, after you & Allerga mourn Ruby. And the loss of the tuna cakes she seemed to love. My thoughts & prayers are with you both. As for your sweet Ruby…. she is free, young & healthy. And of course, watching over her Mom & sister.
I bet, Ruby & Lil BUB are together. And know someday their families will join them. I believe we will join all of our fur kids when we pass on.
Take care Ingrid. Give Allerga a kiss & hug from……
Grayson, Milo & Nancy
Oh Ingrid! Hugging you and Allegra with all my heart. Sometimes there just aren’t the words to convey our deep loss. Fly free sweet Ruby Girl.
dearest Allegra and Ingrid, I’m so, so sorry for your loss of darling Ruby…..my heart aches for you both, and my prayers are with you both. I’m glad you did what you did with Ruby, my choice was the same as your a couple years ago. its not easy to lose a pet, and you both will have to heal slowly. take your time, be comforted by your time together and remember her with love. she’ll be waiting, meantime, comfort each other and know she’s ok now and looking down on you both. Much love to you both, RIP sweet Ruby……you’ll be missed for sure………
I am broken hearted for you, Ingrid. I look at my precious tortie, Sophie, as I write this and I just cannot imagine ever having to say goodbye to her. We adopted her at just 5 weeks and now, at age 7, I pray that she will stay healthy forever.
Ruby will now be playing, happy, and feeling fine. I truly believe that she and all of our beloved fur babies wait for us on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge.
My heart is with you, Ingrid, and I am praying for you and for Ruby. I wish you peace.
I’m so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and Allegra.
So very very sorry. My heart aches for you. Ruby was a blessed kitty to have had your love and special care. She has a special place in all of our hearts because of you.
Oh Ingrid, we are so so sorry to hear this news . Just know that Ruby was such a lucky girl to have been able to live with you. We know just how hard it is to lose our fur friends. Big hugs to you.
Olá Querida. Sinto sua dore sofrimento. Tive que autorizar a eutanasia da minha filhinha a menos de 1 mes. Foram 15 anos ao lado desse ser maravilhoso ,uma felina de nome Bebel. Descobri um cancer agressivo no figado inoperavel, e no mesmo dia desligamos ela ,segundo o veterinario ela estava sofrendo. Eu nao pude nem ao menos me despedir como gostaria. Desejo que voce seja forte e depois do luto tenha sempre em mente as melhores llembraças. Com carinho…uma amiga.
I am so sorry to read about Ruby’s passing. We never, ever have them with us long enough — but we’d be so much less if we didn’t know and love them for the time we do have. My heart is with you and Allegra and Ruby.
When i adopted my cats almost 3 years ago, it was Ingrid, Ruby, and Allegra that helped me overcome the trials and tribulations of being a new cat guardian. Now one of the dynamic trio is no longer with us and her presence will be missed. I learned so much from all of you and will continue to learn. Ruby will live on for all of us who have come to know her.
I am so sorry Ingrid. Ruby was a special and loving girl. Sending you love in your grief.
Oh Ingrid, my heart is breaking for you right now. I know how much Ruby meant to you. I knew this day would come but I hoped you would have more time with her. I am so very sorry for your loss. We will keep you in our prayers.
So sorry for your loss. I pray for healing for you and Allegra.
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for all the photos of Ruby. I feel like I know her. It is not easy losing a pet, they leave enormous holes in our daily lives and in our hearts. I believe you did the most loving thing for her. She knows that and you know that. She could not have been better loved by you. I am so sorry for your loss. I know how it feels.
Adieu, sweet Ruby…
So sorry for your loss. Take care of yourselves, you and Allegra.
Good morning. I am profoundly touched by your posts of Ruby and Allegra and saddened to hear Ruby is now gone. Each time I lose anyone I am close to, the grief tears deep within. I could name so many over the years who I have lost or who passed suddenly but as with so many other people I carry them all with me and those names will always be a part of me and never forgotten.
Seconds become minutes which become hours and days. Nothing is forever except that which we make a part of ourselves and when we pass we take all we are including the love of those we lost to the great beyond and we return all that love whence it came.
Fear not, In time your tears will become joy.
Oh, Ingrid…my heart is breaking for you!! No words can take away your pain so please just know that you’re in my heart, my thoughts and my prayers.
Our hearts, thoughts, prayers are with you. SOAR HIGH , sweet Ruby.
I am sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I’m so sorry. I know how much you loved Ruby. I just lost my Patches last month to lymphoma so I know how difficult it is to lose your beloved cat. Sending you and Allegra my love in this difficult time.
Oh, I am so sorry. The grief, I know is, unexplainable. I lost my Kim on the 15th, and haven’t been able to write about it until now. My hopes are that my baby will send a kitty in need across my path, and I hope that your sweet Ruby will do that for you. Prayers for you and Allegra.
I am so sorry, Ingrid. We’ve never met in person, but I feel like I know you and your girls from reading CC. I wish I could give you a hug and look you in the eye and promise you Ruby will not be forgotten. She will continue to inspire people to be better for their cats – and as the purrfect example of that intangible tortitude.
I am so sorry about the passing of beautiful Ruby! Even though you can pet her or kiss her anymore Ruby will always be in your heart and memory. Ruby is watching you from the rainbow bridge. May she RIP!
My heart hurts and weeps for you and Allegra, Ingrid. I believe Ruby and all animals who pass from this life are in a place of happiness with God. May God give you peace and comfort at this very difficult time.